i can already taste all the potential angst and fic from spider-gwen meeting 616 peter i feel it in my bones
im 100% ready for spider-verse
Remember sometimes getting the song you were actually looking for and sometimes getting an mp3 of bill clinton saying that he didn’t have sexual relations with that woman instead
if you watch one marvel cartoon in your life let it be spectacular spider-man
I feel like it should be a rite of passage for every comic book fan to be told the horrors of the clone saga at least once in their lives! I’m writing a lot of this from memory so it’s probably all wrong, but if you see a mistake just pretend it’s real because the clone saga was so messy it won’t even make a difference.
Kaine is a clone of Peter - somewhere along the line they began to refer to each other as brothers, probably because of Ben Reilly! Ben Reilly was the a clone who Peter…dropped into an incinerator oop. Ben thought he was the real Peter and when he came back to life a couple of years later (I say life, he didn’t really die because comics) he suddenly realized ’fuck i’m a clone’. So Ben went off on a soul finding mission, and then ran into Kaine.
Kaine was the original clone who suffered from degeneration, leaving scars across most of his face. Jackal tried to kill the Kaine but he escaped. Bitter at his existence (and because he’s a big damn baby), he found joy in killing and as the clone degeneration progressed and became more agonizing, Kaine wanted to share his pain with someone and decided Ben Reilly would be that victim (because he’s a big damn baby). Jealous that Ben would never feel the pain of the disease, he vowed to destroy Ben or some shit idk Kaine wasn’t at his best back then
Kaine fell in love with Louise Kennedy (a police officer) and finally began to feel that it was possible for him to experience happiness (wait until you meet aracely uwu). Kaine and Ben fought it out over the years until it was revealed that a Louise was a dirty cop who gave intel to the mob. Kaine hated the fact that Louise was dirty cop and killed her, running off just as Louise’s partner in the force arrived to see her dead at Ben’s feet. And thus began a fucking murder trial that would leave Peter going ‘wait what the fuck’ for many years (also Aunt May had just died so he was especially fucked up during this)
And so we move to the Second Clone Saga which. Fuck. I don’t even know. Peter got away with a murder he didn’t even commit, Kaine went to jail I guess, the Jackal who had died years earlier was a clone (because why the fuck not, you get a clone and you get a clone and gwen stacey gets a clone) and the real Jackal had been in suspended animation for five years to become stronger. Somewhere along the line Ben finds out he’s the real Peter Parker (please stand up please stand up) and Peter finds out he’s a clone. Or something. Ben took the mantle of Spider-Man while Peter. Did Peter stuff. Kaine still hated Ben and would do so until Spider-Man: Redemption, where Kaine tried to kill Ben and Ben’s girlfriend Janine (who was really called Elizabeth and who was supposed to be dead but nah, Kaine just told her to pretend she was because fuck Ben’s happiness) before realising ‘what the fuck am I doing’ and that his years of hating Ben made…no fucking sense. Kaine decided not to kill them and then asked Ben to kill him (there’s a reason Kaine isn’t allowed to make plans anymore).
Ben refused (because he’s a saint for putting up with this shit) and told him to grow the fuck up and get over his shit (in so many words). Kaine tried to kill himself by jumping in front of a few hundred loaded guns, but Ben saved. Kaine was pissed that Ben has interrupted angst time and asked him why. They looked each other in the eyes and realised the Second Clone Saga was a mess let’s find Mephisto and retcon it. They mention being ‘brothers’ and I guess after that Peter couldn’t deny the fact that fuck I have a family made up of fucking clones.
sometimes i think about that man in california who called in over and over again, hundreds of times to sway the phone line vote towards killing jason todd
and then i think about how mad he probably was when jason was brought back to life